And in Walks Jessica Rabbit…

I have been working out.

It is no secret that in the last few years I have really been struggling with my weight. I am not hippo massive, but just uncomfortable with myself. I have tried every diet out there and FINALLY realized that unless I  am super careful with my diet and work out HARD I am not going to make any real progress. Not the foo foo jog on the treadmill or the half -hearted, wienie arm work for 15 minutes… HARD WORK.

My new workout best friend is Chalene Johnson. Her exercise program ChaLEAN Extreme is kicking my butt…literally. I tried workout videos in the 80′s. We all did…I still dislike Jane Fonda, both for her tiny booty and her politics, but whatever. Exercise videos of the past were of some ditzy over-tanned bebop bouncing all over the floor screaming at you to work harder and never breaking a sweat.

I purchased one workout video in the 80′s and promptly threw it away vowing never to buy another one.  I never did until this one. I borrowed my friend Kathleen’s Beachbody video series about 12 years ago and after the first day “Mean Tony Horton” made it so I couldn’t walk, so I gave it back to her. It was way too much for me and I wasn’t of the mind set I am now. And besides it was a video so I had to rewind it every time I wanted to get to the right place.

Chalene Johnson is really encouraging and gives you tons of advice without treating you like someone who has never seen the inside of a gym. The DVD’s are easy to use, varied to keep you interested and VERY result oriented. The ChaLEAN Extreme program has a menu and diet plan that is not hard to follow and believe me I have followed some really wacko ones. This plan involves eating real food. Yes we really DO have to read labels and be careful not to eat everything in sight. Ok I surrender.

Jenny was on Spring break last week so I was able to workout at home in the morning and then do my walks with the dog at lunch. I have started doing 2 workouts a day one ChaLean Extreme and then a nice walk.  I absolutely love it! I think  Chalene has created a monster. If I get stressed I want to workout, if I am bored I want to go run etc. I was NEVER one of THOSE girls but I am now. I am taking great care of myself  and it is beginning to pay off. I am seeing results and muscles everywhere!

Anyway… I was at the gym this am and doing the treadmill thing feeling pretty great about getting to the next level when in walks Jessica Rabbit…..

I have seen J.R. before at the gym and well I loathe her. Just when I get all feeling great about myself the hag walks in and then I get all mental-wobbly about my progress. Before you get all whatever about my attitude…I KNOW she is probably not a bad girl and somewhere some snot named Karma is going to beat me up, but that is what I think. I mean who does she think she is?

She bounces into the ladies room all tight-bunned and tan, waving her ponytail around and instantly I am depressed. I want to run into the shower room and pout like a 4 year old. I think to myself. “Shake that booty at me some more you bratty little blankety-blank.” She moves to the treadmill and turns it on high. I truly hate her now. I am huffing at medium and I am sure she is showing off with making me miserable as her only mission in life. I can think of some really nasty things to call her, and I do….in my head, but VERY LOUDLY!

I need to be positive…my kid said so… I am positive I can’t stand this chick. Ok, it is now “get a grip time.”

So here is my attitude change…for today anyway. Until I see her again I am going to decide that J.R. used to be a 900 lb gorilla and has worked all of that off doing exactly what I am doing and I will look like her in a couple of weeks. We will have fitness competitions and I will beat her! I won’t give up like I normally would and decide nothing is helping fast enough.  THEN all the other gals at the gym will hate me to! Won’t that be fabulous? Hmmmmm

If you want everyone at the gym to hate you to! Sign up for ChaLean Extreme to!